The importance of emotional connections by Nozi Nyawose

The importance of emotional connections by Nozi Nyawose

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PSASA KZN Chapter meeting: 21/07/2020

Last night the KZN chapter had the honour of hosting the amazing Nozibusiso Nyawose, she is a clinical psychologist who runs hr own practice and is a consultant in her field of clinical psychology, she has a Master’s degree in clinical psychology from UKZN and is also a resident psychologist in a popular show on DSTV `s Mzansi magic called ‘uTatakho”.

Key Take away from Nozibusiso`s talk include:

Importance of emotional connections:

This is a critical skill to master with all the people we speak to and interact with on a daily basis, our audiences, colleagues, friends and even our significant others. In psychology if you don’t show your emotions you are labelled as having a “flat effect”. We are emotional creatures as humans, but sometimes our emotions become distorted along the way because of things like gender stereotypes as well as societal norms.

As a clinical psychologist she deals with a lot of people with mental health issues so she has learned how to manage and treat these people accordingly and endorses a practice called “pyscho therapy “as it is useful to assist people with mental health issues.  People need to stop thinking of psychologists as shrinks and mind readers, and really open up to the fact that their jobs depend on emotions and people’s ability to regulate their emotions so they cannot be destructive to themselves and others.

Statistically, more than half of the population suffers from mental health problems, especially depression, anxiety as well as  post-traumatic stress disorder, and now with Covid 19 people are more anxious than ever.  It is important to know that our emotions are valid, and we need to feel them whether or not societal norms allow us to.

Emotional regulation and Mindfulness:

This speaks of the here and now and addressing the feelings we are experiencing currently, and this starts with the brain because it is the centre of everything. The most important part of the brain is the cerebrum as it is the biggest part of the brain and it controls our emotions and being able to have healthy emotional regulations. Healthy emotional regulations mean being cognisant about the way we are feeling in our interactions as well those with others in order to have healthy relationships with the people around us.

When we are NOT aware of our emotional signals, we can become misinterpreted and our communication can be distorted and misunderstood by the people we interact with, and a lot of the things we say can become lost in translation. This can lead to fear and anxiety leading to low self-esteem especially for speakers, this can contribute to a lot of mistakes and a disconnect with your audience.

We must think of our interactions as the dance, and our emotions as the music, when motion takes over it becomes a lot of music in the speakers head which can lead to confusion for the speaker leaving hem feeling like a failure and feeling invalidated by the audience.

The aim is to connect with ourselves and our feeling before we can connect with each other’s; we need to do away with social norms, cultures and stereotypes which block us from being expressive. Aggressive and angry people are those people who supress and ignore their feelings and they bottle things up until they pop and explode.

We need to learn to adapt to the changes which come with this pandemic and move to virtual settings, this can be a challenging task, especially for speakers. But we need to encourage our audience to speak up and express their emotions even in these times. It’s important to have background information of the audience in which you are presenting for as this helps you to understand the people you are engaging with a little bit better, and you will be in a better position to put yourself in their shoes. Having empathy means allowing yourself to go through the emotions with the clients.

Effective communication:

  1. Aggressive communication:

People, who express themselves without taking other people’s opinions into consideration, people who feel “it’s my way or the highway.

  1. Passive communication:

    These people are push overs and are not able to be direct and get their point across, sometimes

  1. Assertive Communication:

      These people can express themselves in a direct way but without hurting other people


  1. Passive aggressive:

These people express their feelings indirectly and subtly.

It is important to have patience and for your audience to feel that you are calm, they need to feel like you are listening to them and fully understand what is being said without having to make assumptions because that’s when things can get lost in translation.

The last point is to be able to manage your anxieties of speaking Infront of an audience, its important to keep your cool so as to maintain positive relationships, as well as letting your audience not loose faith in what you have to say.

To engage further with this lovely lady, please head over to website nozibusiso-nyawose-clinical psychologist-business. Site.

Find out more about the PSASA KZN Chapter Meetings here

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Find out more about the PSASA KZN Chapter Meetings here
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